Life skills

LIFE SKILLS  (from Wikipedia: Life skills are behaviors used appropriately and responsibly in the management of personal affairs. They are a set of human skills acquired via teaching or direct experience that are used to handle problems and questions commonly encountered in daily human life. The subject varies greatly depending on societal norms and community expectations.)

OUTLINE
1*) Giving my boys life skills

--Japanese food is NOT just sushi

--how to leave a tip with a credit card

--crying in the movie theater is ok

2**) Malindi teaches me life skills

--how to blog, a little over one year ago

--green products

3***) Home improvements with Judd:

--shredding my deceased parents’ tax returns so my children won’t have to

 --re-gifting:   to Carol, who might need this perfectly good chalk

--“I wouldn’t use wood for a bathroom floor” 

 (*) Kelcy and Ryley

Judd and I went up to Orono to visit with Kelcy (since Kelcy did NOT have the week off.) I told him we would go out to dinner and rather than BBQ  I chose the Kobe Ninja House.  Kelcy told me we call them African Americans now. I told Kelcy it was a steak house (all true.)  When we arrived the sign said “Kobe Ninja House—Japanese Sushi Bar and Steak House. “ Kelcy got scared.  He told us he doesn’t like sushi and he doesn’t drink.  He was pleasantly super surprised when it turned out to be a knife clicking, grill-on-fire, food in mid air, meat kind of restaurant.  Ten to 12 people joined us around a 4-foot long grill where the table should have been. The chef sliced, diced, juggled, told jokes, flipped vegetables in our mouths and eggs in his hat while we had our lobster or steak or scallops or chicken or fish or shrimp or combination cooked to our liking right before everyone else’s eyes. Periodically there would be a flash of flames up to the ceiling fan where one of the other 8 chefs was setting his sake on fire in front of other patrons. Wait staff would parade through the restaurant pounding on ceremonial drums. It was all quite dramatic. After sending the other kids pics/videos, they figured out what they were missing.  Just when it was time to pay the bill, Judd disappeared to see the décor in the bathroom. Not having enough cash, I paid with a credit card. I got to show Kelcy the trick that you can still add a tip on paper after they run your card. No Judd (or cash) required.

The very next day, we took Ryley to the Mirayaki  (a similar Japanese steak house in Waterville.) I wondered why that chef only squirted the water in Judd’s and the other obvious Dad’s mouth…… til Ryley told me that was the sake!! There was the same little stack of sliced onions set on fire that looked like a volcano and all the same knife and spatula and fire theatrics. Bonus: fried ice cream for dessert.

Judd and Ryley and I had gone to Railroad Square Theater to see Silver Linings Playbook. That’s where I taught Ryley how to cry at the theater. SPOILER ALERT:  we all agreed it was a good movie—an underdog to root for, a romance, a contest, a win……a happy ending.  I cried because not all real life relationships where there is mental illness end happily every after.

 

Fried ice cream

(**) Malindi

It was the end of December 2011, right before I went away to Colorado, that Judd got me my own laptop and Malindi set up my blog so I could tell stories about my travels.  I have bound paper journals for each family vacation and for each kid for all the milestones each child has made over the years. But I have been remiss about writing in them consistently.  Thank you Malindi.
I learned on your blog how to be more chemically conscious with the products i put in and around my body in the name of getting wrinkle-free...

http://malindipineapple.blogspot.com/

p.s. we’ll get you and Graham to a Japanese steak house soon on one of my Portland pass-throughs

(***) Judd

Spring isn’t quite here but we’re probably behind in last year’s spring cleaning. Since Judd was going to make a dump trip, I took a trip to the cellar to see what I could purge. I found that musty, dusty green cardboard file drawer with paperwork from my parents, both long deceased.  It seemed important at the time, to save their bank statements, house deeds, my grandmother’s will, honorable discharge papers, medical files. But at this time, it looked like a mess, a burden to move, a chore for my children to deal with if I didn’t.  Probably 15 years ago before we knew about identity theft and a shredder-in-every-home, I would have just chucked reams of paper in the garbage can and off they would fly to a land fill. But Judd made a cozy spot by the fire for me and I sat for an hour looking through papers and deciding what to shred or burn or recycle. Plenty of things had a social security number on them.  A few documents were still too dear or important to disappear for ever so they are re-stored in a smaller, less dusty green tin box in the cellar for another day.

Several weeks ago, I ripped a little of the downstairs bathroom floor up. And then I ripped  a little more. …. Until there was more subflooring and rotted boards showing than fake old dirty allegedly-white linoleum.  I’m okay with that look. At least everyone knows I’m not trying to make the bathroom look white and clean. Judd has not been happy with the location of the bathroom for forever (too near the living spaces and of questionable earshot of company rocking in front of the fire.) Also, he has always coveted a bathroom where the toilet is in line sight of a window where one can contemplate the beautiful outdoors when one is busy with business. So, we are changing out the bathroom and the laundry room. I moved the large wardrobe with the sheets and towels up to Malindi’s old room.  I purged things from  the last 20 years..…Disney passes, five year old sunscreen, Sugarloaf passes with 4, 6 and 11 year old Ryley, Kelcy and Malindi pictures. I couldn’t see throwing away a perfectly good box of colored chalk so decided Carol still has little people visiting her and she should inherit it for making hopscotch on the garage floor. 

We have now removed the laundry room sink, the bathroom shower and cupboards. Judd took a saw and a hammer to the drywall and *poof* we’re into renovation-mess just like that: little white drywall dust footprints all over the house, bins of old wood, bent nails, plaster, bags for Goodwill filling up. A goal for a functional bathroom relocation would be the 13^th annual Cinco de Mayo party with 50+guests—but that’s a flexible goal.  Some folks manage with only one upstairs bathroom all their life.

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Laundry room sans sink and shelves

downstairs bathroom

Judd and I have even done a couple Home Depot or LaPointe’s Lumber stops to look at sinks, floors, tile, wood. We were looking a hard wood compared to composite wood. The LaPointe’s lady looked deathly grim, “I wouldn’t put any wood in a bathroom.”    Okay, we’ll rethink /re-research that.

It is a life skill to pick out home furnishings, floors, wall colors and stay married.   We’ve done it before. We’ll do it again (pick out furnishings I mean, not get married again, unless it’s to each other.)